Should I Quit Drinking? And What Should I Wear?
Plus what I wore last week, recreating my latest Pinterest saves, and a transcendent blueberry crisp
Yes, I probably should. While we were traveling this summer, my three-year-old son kept running around pointing both fingers at the sky and yelling “No Rules!!” At the top of his lungs. Not sure where he picked that up (probably from one of my 8 nephews), but he echoed my vacation sentiment. Why is it that when you’re sleeping in a bed other than your own, the rules don’t apply? Wine on a Tuesday? And Wednesday and Thursday? Sure, why not? You’re on vacation! Kind of.
Things really start to get ugly when that vacation lasts for 6 weeks. And oh my god, the hangovers. I wouldn’t even call them that, because I’m having two glasses max, so it’s more like a haze-over. My skin looks ruddy. My head is fuzzy. I slept like sh**. Long gone are my college days when I could take three shots before a night out and still spring out of bed for class upon sunrise.
Will our kids think of our collegiate binge drinking how our generation thinks of drug use in the sixties? Maybe the pendulum will swing back. Who knows.
Why do we drink? I can’t answer for the gen pop, but I can for myself. First, and most importantly, it’s fun. It just is. And I like to have fun. But there is more to the story, at least for me. As a historically shy person, I know that a drink or two will allow me to loosen up. Alcohol is a social anxiety elixir, especially when confronted with new acquaintances. With a sometimes high-stress lifestyle, a drink allows for a release at the end of the day. Among friends, it is somewhat of a bonding ritual. If we are still friends after we all let loose and say too much, a certain level of trust builds. The funny stories from the night before become memories (albeit fuzzy ones).
Clink a glass of champagne to celebrate a birthday, an anniversary, or a new year. Sip a martini at a steak house. Savor a glass of wine over a romantic dinner. Cheers a beer at a sports game. Cozy up with a hot toddy after a day of skiing. I could go on and on. Alcohol is so woven into our cultural zeitgeist that sobriety feels like societal exile.
So, why stop? First, my health. I’ve written before about how I’ve rearranged my life to hopefully win my battle against heart disease. A 2-4 drink night is one of my last remaining “bad habits” (along with my love for French fries). At a minimum, everyone should listen to this podcast by Andrew Huberman, so you’re at least you’re making informed consent. Second (which is really first, because if I don’t have my health, I can’t be there for them), is my kids. As a working mom, my time with my kids is already so limited. It feels unfair that the two days a week during which they have my full attention, I am showing up at half-mast. There is no third reason, but shouldn’t that be enough?
For now, I’ve cut way back. Once a week, two drink max, and wrapping it up at least two hours before I go to bed. TBD on whether I take that next step and swear it off completely. There is, however, something to be said for just relaxing and enjoying life. If you’ve said goodbye to booze, I would love to hear about your experience.
You may be wondering what this has to do with clothes? Well, nothing really. Just writing about what is on my mind. In other news, my weekly wardrobe, some recent Pinterest finds, and a sweet summer treat are below.
PIN-SPO
I thought I would share some of my recent Pinterest saves and how I would recreate them IRL. I am an O.G. Pinterest user, and every season I make a new board to stockpile outfit inspiration. For example, the images below inspired my errands outfit on Sunday (would have been even better with a thrifted button down!).
Here are a few additional ideas with corresponding links. These are all outfits I would wear as summer dwindles. My future potentially sober self could be seen in any of these.
Which one is your fave?
WHAT I WORE LAST WEEK:
I may be shopping for fall, but my day-to-day is all summer. I am still wearing white & linen everything. This time of year is always hard for me as a Phoenician because the temps start to lower elsewhere in the U.S. while we are still on broil. Know that I envy you at your kid’s soccer game this fall, wearing a denim jacket or cute pullover while I’m sweating sideline.
MONDAY: Oh, how I love these pants. They cost way too much, but the fit is pristine. I paired them with an old Agolde tank and my Etsy tassel necklace. The shoes are old Mango—they are going on season 2 on the hit list, but since I didn’t pack them on my trips this summer, they haven’t gotten much play time. The bag was a gift from a friend. I forgot I had it until I found it while searching for the last roll of toilet paper in the house. What a happy surprise!
TUESDAY: This outfit is made entirely of closet staples, and it is great for a hot day. The vest is last season Aritzia, but they still make it, and it comes in a lot of colors. I love it with a more voluminous bottom (trousers, fuller skirts, wide leg denim).
WEDNESDAY: I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. If you are not thrifting men’s button downs, you are missing out. This Brooks Brother’s gem fits great, is the color of the season, and cost me a whole $7. My shorts are also vintage.
THURSDAY: I linked this H&M top last week, and I foresee it getting a lot of use as we move from one season to the next. These shorts have gotten a lot of play this summer too. My flats once had a strap, but I cut it off, and I think they look much cooler this way.
FRIDAY: This outfit was newly inspired by a fellow working mom / substacker
. I’m realizing that Substack has this whole network of fashion people that cheer each other on—it is very cool. I’m not sure I fit neatly in the “fashion” category, since I write about so many other topics, but I love to see the vibrant community. And yes, I did jump on the boat shoe trend. I am not one to skip out on a trend just because I wore it the last time ‘round. I loved my Sperry’s in 2012, and I love the new rounded shape that I’m seeing today. Now, dresses over pants? Hated it in 2006, and I hate it now!
SATURDAY: This top is by The Line by K. If, like me, you follow a zillion style influencers on Instagram, you may remember it taking the ‘gram by storm last summer. I impulsively took the bait. I am not really a “cute top” kind of girl (more into buildable basics). It was expensive (and of course an Amazon dupe was available about a week later). I do love it, but now when I wear it, it feels a bit played out. The jorts give it a bit of a new life, in my mind.
SUNDAY: A Sunday Double Dip because we spent the morning at the pool, followed by running errands with my daughter. This was a very monochromatic week for me.
FOOD:
Until this week, I had gone all summer without making a fruit pie, crisp, or crumble. I couldn’t let this travesty continue. My mom makes an incredible blueberry pie, but unfortunately, you can’t buy Pillsbury products at my grocery store of choice, and I was not in the mood to make my own pie crust. Enter, the crumble. I used this NYT recipe, but subbed tapioca starch for cornstarch because that was all I had. It was delightful. Van Leeuwen’s Ice Cream was on sale. The vanilla bean over the warm blueberry crisp? Are you kidding me?? My family, however, didn’t eat a bite. They don’t know what they were missing.
For the Topping
1 lemon
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1 cup flour
1/2 cup sliced almonds
1/2 teaspoon fine salt
1/2 cup unsalted butter, melted and cooled
For the Filling
1/2 cup granulated sugar
3 tablespoons tapioca starch
3 pints of blueberries
Vanilla ice cream, for serving
Preheat the oven to 375 degrees. Zest the lemon into the sugar in a medium bowl and mix, rubbing the zest and sugar together between your fingers. Mix in the flour, almonds and salt. Pour the butter over the dry ingredients. Stir until it turns crumbly.
To make the filling, whisk the sugar and tapioca starch in a large bowl. Add the blueberries and squeeze in the juice from the lemon. Toss until evenly coated, then scrape into a 9 x 11 baking dish or a pie plate and spread evenly. Cover the berries with the topping. Bake until the top is golden and the blueberries are bubbling, 40 to 45 minutes. Let it cool for 15-30 minutes before you scoop it into a bowl with some ice cream and transcend into nirvana. See photo below for the untouched bowls of my children. I ate mine and theirs.
IN SUM:
Hope you all are enjoying the dog days of summer. Thank you for being here. I appreciate every like, comment, share, etc., so much. Don’t forget to follow me on Instagram at @hi_itsmejaymee for more outfit inspo and shopping finds!
XOXO
Jaymee
late 30s hangovers are obscene, with you sister!
I haven’t drunk in 11 years (mid 30s hangover got me!) and I feel amazing pretty much every day! I really do!